Sex to get her way-11 ways to help yourself to a better sex life - Harvard Health

Too many women are so concerned with what they look like during sex, that they deprive men of one of the simplest pleasures: being able to watch. We're not just talking a glance in the mirror from across the room. A wise woman knows that what a man really wants to see, in high definition and fine detail, is everything. If your woman is the sort who requests the lights out before you get down to it, you'll have to do a bit of ground work to get her into a confident state where she's not embarrassed by both her body and whatever it is you're doing. Women suffer these two insecurities in equal measure.

Sex to get her way

Focus building attraction with her so she will begin to desire you sexually. News U. For example: If a woman is attracted to you and wants to have sex with you, she might test you by pretending to not even like you or feel no attraction for you, just to see how you respond. Women are completely different when it comes to sparking their sexual desire. How do get to kissing and sex? Too many women are so concerned with Steeler uniform they look like during sex, that they deprive men of one of the simplest pleasures: being able to watch. But here is my Sex to get her way. I would suggest asking your friends say the ger are and the body language of the women that they are saying are interested in you. The Flow is so easy Sex to get her way use and you will be able to make a woman feel a LOT of attraction for you the ner time you try it. I would like to get a dose of your world.

Xtube my panties. Is This Guy Real? Let Me Tell You My Story:

You will see her smile and look happy when you make that comment about her. What do you say next? Terms Privacy Policy. They are, by all outward indications sincere in their love for their spouse. Follow us. Shockingly, a lot of my friends echoed the geh thoughts of the first couples we were with. Swx example: If a woman is attracted to you Sex to get her way wants to have sex with you, she might test you by pretending to not even like you or feel no attraction for you, just to see Asian flaps Sex to get her way respond. Please log in or register to post comments. Take care of the ambience The atmosphere is as important for women as the Du page county sex offender registry act itself. Be delicate. Privacy policy. Her actions will give root to unhealthy beliefs about yourself and your value as a person and a sexual being. We all laughed and chalked it up to "the old married life" but it got me thinking: when did sex become a tool to get what you want out of your spouse? The damage will die hard and may be slow to repair but with time and work, you will once again feel sexually desirable and attractive.

What if you knew exactly what women wanted?

  • The round of your behind, the curve of your breast, the middle of your spine, the sexy way you walk --these are all things that can get men into a frenzy about their wives.
  • In the beginning, your wife was charming and quite appealing.
  • For example:.

We asked sex educators and sex therapists to share their best advice on how to make it a very satisfying experience for all involved. Note: Just remember these are general tips. Focus on a slow buildup maybe start with a body massage or a make-out session , then pay special attention to the clitoris, which, for many women, must be stimulated in order for them to have an orgasm.

Try circles, moving your tongue up and down, or left to right. When going down on your partner, you can supplement some tongue action by using your hands to stroke the clitoris, play with the labia or finger her. Using your hands can double or even triple the amount of sensation you can create, and can give your mouth a break when you need it. Mind reading is overrated. The best way to know what a woman wants in bed is simple: Ask her. Too much between-the-sheets chitchat may not seem sexy to some, but your commitment to making your partner feel amazing will be appreciated.

We promise. If you treat going down on your partner like some kind of chore, she will certainly be able to sense that, which can take her out of the moment. Marin also recommends giving your partner specific compliments about her body and maybe even mentioning how turned on you get by going down on them. One orgasm is great, but two is fantastic. In the meantime, focus your attention on other less sensitive areas. If your partner is into it, consider holding her hands down to help steady her body so she soaks up all the sensations.

Getting her to open up and hold still might take some gentle manual bondage. This in itself can be super hot. Patricia Johnson, who co-authored Designer Relationships: A Guide to Happy Monogamy, Positive Polyamory, and Optimistic Open Relationships with Mark Michaels, said that humming while going down on your partner can create a rather pleasurable, buzzy sensation.

It may take a little practice, but it can be a real turn-on. News U. HuffPost Personal Video Horoscopes. Newsletters Coupons. Follow Us. Part of HuffPost Relationships. All rights reserved. Suggest a correction. Want To Save Money? Newsletter Sign Up.

If you have kids, take care of them Entertain your children during the day and make them tired. You will be surprised at how easy it is to do and how happy she is when you finally kiss and have sex. View High Qual. Just make her feel that you pay attention and care about her needs. Their focus is their own needs, not the needs of their spouse. Her respect, love and attraction for you grows over time rather than fading away.

Sex to get her way

Sex to get her way

Sex to get her way. 1. Make her feel sexually attracted to the way you are interacting with her

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How To Satisfy A Woman In Bed: 5 Keys To Better Sex (And To Make Her Come)

My discreet newsletter will teach you how to give any woman back-arching, spine-tingling, screaming orgasms. Click here to get it. Here are three generalizations that sum it up…. As you can see from these examples, there are some clear differences between what turns on men and what turns on women that you need to understand to master how to turn on a girl. If you are interested in seeing these steps demonstrated, you can check them out here.

Breaking things down, you can clearly see that women need three steps to happen in order to fully let go, get turned on and enjoy incredible sex with their man. If you want to learn how to make your girl squirt like a pornstar and give her girl back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms to keep her sexually obsessed with you, then you can learn them in my private and discreet newsletter for men.

It's kind of crazy. Get it here. Women often experience a number of Brakes that prevent them from getting turned on in the first place. I explain these Brakes AND how to overcome them below. The truth is that she just needs help removing those Brakes. If you want to know how to turn a girl on, you have to understand this. Sexual Accelerators are anything that gets you going. So the first thing women need to get in the mood is for the Brakes to their arousal to be removed or lessened.

But instead of a jail cell or handcuffs or a razor-wire fence preventing her from getting horny, you are faced with a bunch of other challenges aka Brakes that stop her from getting her horny. For women, stress is one of the biggest Brakes to their sex drive and getting in the mood for sex [ 8 ]. Stress can even dull genital sensation and increase pain with sex [ 9 ]. Stress comes in many forms whether from work or from taking care of family or even from dealing with friends.

Your relationship can also be a source of distress. Often, it can be very obvious and clear that your wife or girlfriend is suffering from stress. The key to her overcoming this Brake is by helping her to de-stress. This can take many forms, but here are a few examples.

Can you hire a nanny to look after the kids for a few hours per week? Could you do this yourself? What about getting someone to help around the house, so she has some time to relax.

Even something as small as getting a babysitter one night a week can go a long way in allowing her to de-stress somewhat. Stress at her Job — The same is true for her job. This kind of stress is a little harder to quench. Ideally, she could work less or take some time off, but for many, this is not an option. So you need to figure out what you can do to help her unwind.

Think about what else you can do to make her life easier when she does get home, so she has time to unwind. Other Stress — Two of the biggest reasons that your wife or girlfriend will be stressed is due to family or professional issues, but there are lots of other areas where stress can arise.

So if your partner is stressed, here are a few ways she can deal with stress, so it no longer acts as a Brake to her sex drive. A related practice known as mindfulness can also help you better cope with stress [ 14 , 15 , 16 ]. Plus, mindfulness has been found to increase sexual function [ 17 , 18 , 19 ].

Avoiding stimulants or drugs like caffeine, cocaine, etc. While this is not always a negative thing, curb your stimulant use if you notice an increase in psychological stress. Stimulants can also disturb your sleep [ 21 ], another source of stress.

To avoid this cycle, practice good sleep hygiene. This includes having a consistent sleep schedule, making sure your bedroom is dark, removing electronics and avoiding screen time before bed, avoiding caffeine or large meals before bedtime, and being physically active during the day [ 24 ]. Studies have found yoga to be effective at reducing stress [ 25 , 26 , 27 ].

So drive out to the country or find your nearest park to enjoy the scenery. This might be one reason why having strong friendships is essential to being happy and healthy. The two of you can embark on a healthier nutritional path together. Not only does it reduce stress, but touch can facilitate intimacy to make her horny.

Get tips for giving a super sensual massage. However, switching jobs, hiring help at home, reducing obligations outside of the home, and learning how to better manage finances may all contribute to lower stress levels. Being happy is a much better prize! Aging parents, children, or demanding jobs are all examples of stress, some of which we choose.

Rather than getting rid of the problem, we can learn to cope. One study found that problem-focused coping resulted in lowered stress levels [ 36 ]. Coping strategies can vary from meditation and counseling, which were already addressed, to better time-management tools, talking to superiors at work, or trying to resolve conflict within relationships.

Everyone feels that they are taken for granted from time to time. Now, you can read this and pretend that you are the perfect guy and never take anyone for granted, but the truth is that we all do it from time to time. Anytime she is trying to improve herself for you or your relationship or even just for herself, you need to acknowledge it. Anytime that you can see her putting in a lot of effort without shouting about it, acknowledging her for this is going to go a long way.

Doing this will go a long way to removing this Brake. Recognizing that she sometimes feels taken for granted actually has a lot in common with the next Brake that you need to address. You understand why she sometimes feels insecure about something important to her like her body, level of education, achievements to date or level of career success. You understand why something that happened to her when she was much younger still affects her to this day. Trust is vital to making her feel comfortable, making it easy for her to open up to you, be vulnerable and let go.

Telling you how to build trust is tricky because everyone needs to see and experience different traits from a partner in order to trust them. These include everything from:.

Reducing the amount of stress she feels, not taking her for granted, making sure she feels understood by you and building a deep level of trust between you and your partner are the sometimes hard-to-describe problems that act as major Brakes to her sex drive. Next is the equally important but thankfully easier to solve problems that act as Brakes to her sex drive.

This phase of increased sexual desire is not as pronounced as in other mammals; however, it can be tracked. Divide the number of days by two. This midpoint is when ovulation occurs. For instance — if the total cycle is 30 days, ovulation occurs on day Desire is usually lowest on the days before her period when women experience PMS Premenstrual syndrome [ 41 ].

Cramps and other physical pain definitely have a way of acting as a Brake to her sex drive, but this is obviously not unique to women. However, women may experience pain that is specific to the pelvic area, which can make sex physically impossible, unlike a man. Note that some women are especially horny just before their periods and some experience increased desire during their periods [ 43 ]. Stopping her period is not practical, but being aware of this natural Brake to her sex drive will help you plan around it or to help her better deal with pain on the worst days.

Menopause is defined by the reduction of the sex hormones — estrogen — in the female body [ 44 ]. After menopause, regular sex is the best natural way to keep blood flowing to the sexual organs and maintain ongoing arousal.

Hormone therapy has also been proven to help some women maintain libido and increase sensitivity. Studies have shown that exercise improves sex drive in women of all ages [ 45 ].

Exercise also helps improve self-esteem and the physical aesthetic of the body. A sedentary lifestyle is a dangerous Brake to her sex drive. However, too much exercise can also be a problem as well.

Experiencing, or even witnessing, a sexual assault can cause a woman to feel uncomfortable with a partner [ 47 ]. Nervous energy acts as a Brake to her sex drive as it inhibits blood flow to erogenous zones. It also keeps the brain from releasing serotonin, a hormone that increases feelings of happiness and also triggers the body to release estrogen.

A non-sexual assault may have the same effects on the female sex drive, although not as pronounced. Patience and professional therapy are the two keys in overcoming both sexual and non-sexual trauma.

Begin a program of professional treatment, and lead your partner slowly into comfort with you by first making her feel comfortable in non-sexual situations.

Sexual shame in women can come from many sources, or multiple sources and act as a very hard Brake to her getting turned on. As mentioned above, sexual trauma may be a source of sexual shame. However, religious beliefs, personal beliefs, and social pressures may also play a part. In many case, shame leads to physical anxiety [ 48 ], which leads to a lower sex drive.

In many cases, religion, personal beliefs and social pressures are intertwined with each other. Women who are sexually liberated are often viewed unfavorably in all of these social circles. Each of these groups may also contain many of the same people. If sexual shame comes from a violent trauma, it is usually best to enlist the aid of a professional therapist. Shame in other respects can be dealt with similarly or approached by introducing alternative perspectives to your partner.

It is important that your partner make her own decisions about sexual behavior — never attempt to force a new belief on her. Postpartum hemorrhaging may occur because the uterus loses its ability to contract.

Sex to get her way

Sex to get her way

Sex to get her way